Developing Story: Tom Brady’s Super Bowl 51 Jersey Was Reportedly Stolen After The Game

How dare someone steal from Mr. Thomas Edward Patrick Brady Jr?

ProFootballTalk — Tom Brady’s Super Bowl LI jersey went missing after Sunday’s win over the Falcons. So who stole it?

While there’s a chance (slim) that it was merely misplaced and not swiped, it’s far more likely that someone deliberately got his or her hands on the jersey for the purposes of selling it at a profit — and that Brady possibly noticed it was gone before the real jersey could be replaced in Brady’s bag with a copy.

That’s one of the allegations made in a still-pending lawsuit regarding memorabilia irregularities involving the Giants. Specifically, it’s been claimed that Hall of Fame defensive end Michael Strahan’s jersey from Super Bowl XLII was taken and replaced with a replica that was made to look like it actually had been worn by Strahan in the game.

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God damn it, people. This is why we can’t have nice things. This is why we don’t deserve Tom Brady, or Bill Belichick, or the Patriots. Because we’re terrible people straight to our cores and we just take everything great in the world and destroy it. We were given a beautiful planet, and we ruined it. We were given Facebook as a way to stay connected, and we turned it into a forum for uber-conservative political rants and Farmville requests from older relatives. And we were given the greatest quarterback, head coach, franchise, and game in the history of sports… and we stole the man’s jersey afterwards. Disgusting.

I guess if it had to happen to someone, might as well be Tom; he’s got 4 others. But as everyone knows, and Bob Kraft told us after the game, this one’s definitely the sweetest. It doesn’t get much better than that, and that jersey definitely means a lot to the greatest man to ever grace us with his presence on planet Earth. All eyes will be out for it for sure, and I gotta think there’s a good chance they track it down and get it back to him, but I guess we’ll see.

Update: We have the Texas Rangers on the case:

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  • Fan of Boston sports, hazy IPAs, and chicken pot pie. Frequent user of obscure movie quotes that nobody else finds funny.

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